bandits3

Been spending the week, re-doing my essays. piling misfortune apon misfortune, i found it really hard to concentrate in school. it all culminated in a boiling point during another one of amitavo's philosophy lectures, when i suddenly realised i was in a violent and unhappy rage. i fantasised about running up to the front and burying my pen deep into his jugular, putting an abrupt and permanent end to his incoherent ramblings about the knowability of knowledge. i took another look at the poor man, and regretted contemplating his death, pulling the plug and letting all the vitriol disappear to wherever my vitriol magically disappears to. All this in preparation for a fantastic fireworks display in the future.

People i was once close to, are drifting away. i reckon it takes about a decade to go from former best friend to absolute stranger. every subsequent time u see them, all u really see is an epitaph for former closeness. Its so easy to promise forever and believe it before u know what forever really means.

went to bandits on friday, and danced for hours to grinding distorted electro, trying to outrace that growing shitball of rejection, sadness, bitterness, fear and disappointment by trying my level best to resemble a malfunctioned robot. By 4 in the morning, i reckon i was largely successful.

Today i went to the beach with zom, sid and simon. It was blazing hot, and i was sure id become a shade of wesley snipes by the end of the day. The water was icy though. Had childlike fun tossing and tumbling thru foam and salt from tall relentless breakers. at night me and mark, followed sid on a dodgy errand in a dodgy part of town, before i went home. i guess that about brings us to the present.