your glassy eyes betray you

death and television

Havnt updated my blog in a long time.
kris is back for a week. its been great. when your other is 6997km away you try and build up your life here, do your own thing and be independent. its not that i love her any less, i just need that. she feels that i dont need her anymore, that im so absorbed in my own life, thats shes just a small part of it and when shes away i put that part in refrigeration.

its not true of course, but you ineveitably become self-absorbed in yourself as an individual when your alone. when shes back all of that disappears in an instant. i have been having great evenings with her. The sidewalks have stories to tell again. Worn buildings release old feelings through their cracks, the evening skies let you let drown if you only have the time to look up. things are just like how they used to be when before i got into the army. shes leaving on sunday. my hearts gonna crack a little bit more when i see walk through the glass of the airport departure lounge.

departure is such a cold word. the cold feel of finality of it as the syllables scrape of your tongue that was only moments before bathed in the warmth of her mouth. Depature sounds like the name of a morose norse god. every second lasts a thousand years.
distance kills.

what secrets do you keep in your ears?